Our time and energy are finite resources, so when we disagree with someone, we have to decide whether it’s something we care about enough to make it worth pursuing, or whether it’s easier to just pretend to agree and move on with our lives. Or maybe you find yourself fake-agreeing with someone because you don’t want to ruffle any feathers, even if it’s something that really bothers you. Either way, you have other options.

Some people enjoy a heated debate or a good argument, or at least have no problem telling others when they disagree with them. Others, so-called “people pleasers,” go out of their way to avoid any kind of interpersonal conflict, confrontation or disagreement, says Jolie Silva, PhD, a clinical psychologist and chief operating officer of New York Behavioral Health.

According to Silva, there are three ways to deal with disagreements: Passivity, assertiveness, and aggression. “Passivity is usually a sign that someone is avoiding disagreements because they are ultimately avoiding an uncomfortable emotion, such as fear or guilt, that would likely arise if they were having the disagreement,” she explains.

For some people, it goes beyond simply avoiding conflict: They may also fear how the disagreement will impact their relationship with the other person or how the other person views them, says Courtney Morgan, a licensed professional clinical counselor (LPCC) and founder of Counseling Unconditionally, a mental health practice in Louisville, Kentucky. Or, as Carl Nassar, PhD, LPC, a professional counselor in Denver, points out, some people would rather end the discussion as quickly as possible to avoid spending time engaging in a disagreement, opting to “go along for the sake of going along.”